Did chronic ne’er-do-well Willie Loomis (John Karlen) really expect to discover the “Collins Family Jewels” hidden away in the crypt at Eagle Hill Cemetery? It was his shame for unleashing Barnabas Collins on an unsuspecting Collinsport that would end up being hidden. The male vampire’s prospective wound on Willie’s neck was simply too man-sexy for daytime television of the era, so it was inflicted on his wrist instead. The ultimate karmic punishment for opening the Pandora’s Box of television gothic horror, however, was 124 episodes spent as Harvey, long-suffering husband of Tyne Daly on Cagney & Lacey.
“Julia, get a sedative!”
Psychologist Julia Hoffman (Grayson Hall) is a perpetual houseguest at Collinwood after abandoning her administrative duties at Windcliff Sanitarium. The inmates must certainly be running the asylum now, rioting in the common areas, burning trash and demanding food and water. Meanwhile, her unrequited longing for Barnabas Collins—manifested in compulsive hand wringing—is occasionally interrupted by a scramble for her doctor’s bag, in search of a fresh syringe to calm the latest bout of Collins family histrionics. Eyes narrow, lips purse, music cues…fade to black.